To Every Beamish Child

The day began at 6 PM;
   At 6 PM it ends.
At 6 PM a cherry brehm 
   Will puff with harey friends.
O frabjous day!  Callooh!  Callay!
   I chortle in my joy!
A madly glad Mad Hatter Day
   To every girl and boy!

At 6 PM I drank some tea;
   At 6 PM drank more.
At 6 PM a Tumtum tree
   I smoked, then went to snore.
O frabjous day!  Callooh!  Callay!
   I urkel loud and wild!
A madly glad Mad Hatter Day
   To every beamish child!

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A Suite in Honor of National Coffee Day

TO MY CUP OF COFFEE

Hazy and lazy…slow of registry…
Yawning and looking round me in a fog…
All the day long a traffic jam-like clog
Of thoughts congealed and thick and movement-free…
Were you not there each dawn to liven me—
To perk my senses, set my mind a-jog,
And give my sluggishness the whip and flog—
This jello-minded zombie would I be!
And afternoons I’d feel a lethargy:
I’d faintly flag, and laggardly I’d slog
And trudge and drudge and grope through sludge and grog
Were you not there to fill me with esprit.
You turn me on and leave me all agog!
You are my princess: Kiss me! I’m your frog!


ARISE AND SHINE

I've heard it said
To quicken the dead
A voodoo rite perform.
But hear me well:
You need no spell
The dead to wake and warm.

You need but take
A coffee break
And wet a corpse's lips
With drops of Joe
Until it show
A thirst for little sips.


A DRINKING SONG

I need it when I wake at dawn
And when I wake at noon;
I need it when I wake and yawn
Beneath a silver moon.

And then my thirst cannot be slaked:
I drink a couple pots,
(Or more if when I waked I baked
And downed a couple shots.)

And never dare you give to me
A cup of voltless Joe!
You'll quake with fear to watch and see
The hissy-fit I'll throw!

Coffee, I say! Give me a cup!
And fill it to the brim!
Give me a cup! I'll drink it up
With vigor, verve, and vim!


CAFFEINE

To get to baseline I need a drug
Delivered to me in an oversized mug;
And if I need it, and I can't get it,
Holy mother of hell, I regret it!


TEA FOR TWO

If you desire some stimulation
I'll brew you a cup of tea;
And if you desire some relaxation
I'll make it caffeine-free.

But spiked or not,—black, green, or Grey,—
No matter how it's took,—
Tea's best enjoyed on a rainy day
In a threesome with a book.

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A Drinking Song

I need it when I wake at dawn,
   And when I wake at noon;
I need it when I wake and yawn
   Beneath a silver moon.

And then my thirst cannot be slaked:
   I drink a couple pots,
(Or more if, when I waked, I baked
   And downed a couple shots.)

And never dare you give to me
   A cup of voltless Joe!
You'll quake with fear to watch and see   
   The hissy-fit I'll throw!

Coffee, I say!  Give me a cup!
   And fill it to the brim!
Give me a cup!  I'll drink it up
   With vigor, verve, and vim!

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